Tabu Mone Rekho

Tagore had written this poignant song in 1888--4 years after his sister-in-law Kadambaris suicide. The lyrics imply as if Kadambaris soul was requesting a life-long remembrance of her, regardless of her sinful act! That Rabindranath had often blamed himself for causing her death is quite evident here. Perhaps an explanatory factoid is also in order At the age of 17 in 1878, Rabindranath Tagore had traveled to England to study law. Prior to his departure he had stayed for a short while in Ahmedabad with his elder civil servant brother, Satyendranath. During this time he had befriended an attractive emancipated Maharashtrian girl named Anna. She was the daughter of their landlord, Atmaram Turkhud who was a social reformer of Bombay. Perhaps it was love at first sight and the couple exchanged a few passionate letters while he was away in Brighton and later in London. Rabindranath had named her Nalini and had also dedicated a few songs to her. In early 1879, while Rabi was enduring a London winter, Atmaram Turkhud visited Calcutta with Anna. It seems highly likely that marriage between Ana and Rabi was touted by Atmaram, but rejected by Debendranath, Rabis saintly father. One could speculate that perhaps Rabindranaths decision to drop out of London University was a latent retaliation to his fathers rejection of Anna. Upon his return to India, he stayed for sometime at Satyendranaths house, transferred to Bombay by this time. While still lamenting over his lost love, Anna, the hopelessly romantic Rabindranath succumbed to the charms of Bibi (aka Indira Debi), his adolescent niece. She had grown up in Brighton, was fluent also in French, and the two would often sing and dance waltzes together. This developing fondness for each other hadnt escaped the doubting eyes of Bibis anglicized socialite mother, Gyanadanandini. Fearing the worst possible outcome from this intimacy, the latter arranged Rabindranaths marriage to Mrinalini, an illiterate, but wealthy girl from the Kuchbehar estates! Back at JorashaNko, in their joint-family mansion, Tagore once again had a taste of his Lady He (short for Hecate), a nickname given to Kadambari—his muse for the past 17 years. She was secretly opposed to his marriage to Mrilanini, but had said nothing. By this time,Tagores passion and imagined lust for Kadambari had taken an extreme form. Just two months after his marriage he had published Chhabi o Gaan (Pictures and Songs) which contained a poem Rahur Prem, the Dragons Head that eternally chases the moon. Here is a paraphrase of one verse: I shall chase you like terror in the day, like a nightmare in the night. Like a living skeleton in a famine I shall stretch my hand before you and pester you to give and give and give. Like a thorn I shall prick you day and night, like a curse I shall haunt you, like a fate I shall follow you--as night follows day, as fear follows hope." Two months later Kadambari had successfully taken her own life.