GHETTO CHRISTMAS CAROLS

KMONEYKREATIONS PRESENTS: GHETTO CHRISTMAS CAROLS {Exclusive sample-preview. Bonus sing-along cd included in full- version!} {The contents of this book are the sole imagination and property of the authors. As such, any unauthorized reproduction is hereby prohibited by all copywriting laws. Additionally, this book is meant for adult entertainment purposes only. Any offense to characters both real and fictional is unintentional and purely coincidental. Reader discretion is advised.} SANTAS RESIGNATION Gather around little children cuz Santa has somethin to say bout why I got tired of riding in that raggedy-ass sleigh I use to get up every Christmas Eve lugging bags filled with toys To issue out to little bad-ass girls and boys Who didnt mind their mommas and didnt go to school So I figured yall must thank that Im a got-damn fool! I got sick of you begging bastards writing to me like Im ya father When yo own momma and daddy dont wanna be bothered Oh Santa, I want a doll and I want a car Well you snot-nosed son-of-a-bitches done went too got-damned far! Why should I put somethin underneath yo tree When yall aint ne-e-e-ever did a got-damned thang for me?! Now I done changed my address I dont live at the North Pole no mo So if you try to send me letters, aint no tellin where they gonna go I done fired all my elves and even let Mrs. Claus go But that aint no love lost cuz she wasnt nothin but a hoe! When I left on Christmas Eve I left her home by herself I come back Christmas morning, she smellin just like elf! So, Merry Christmas, Seasons Greetings, Happy Hanukah too Yall can kiss my black ass Point blank, and Im through! X Santa Claus Santa Claus Aint Comin This Way NO need to watch out, dont care if you cry Dont care if you pout Im tellin you why Santa Claus aint comin this way Hes not comin on your block Hes scared he might get shot So the things he gave you last year are The only things youve got NO need to watch out, dont care if you cry Dont care if you pout Im tellin you why Santa Claus aint comin this way He know you are some bad kids He knows its just a sham He knows about the toys you want but Santa dont give a damn! NO need to watch out, dont care if you cry Dont care if you pout Im tellin you why Santa Claus aint comin this way Cant you see there is no chimney For Santa to come down And he wouldnt park his reindeer on this scandalous side of town NO need to watch out, dont care if you cry Dont care if you pout Im tellin you why Santa Claus is passing you by Hype Christmas Im dreaming of a hype Christmas Just like the ones I use to know Where the fortys glisten and chickens crispin And hoes wear high-heels in the snow (the snow) Im dreaming of a hype Christmas With every bogus check I write I hope the D.A. doesnt indite And may all your Christmases be hype! Jingle Bells Dashing through the snow On a high-speed police chase Baby Momma called PO-PO Cuz I punched her in the fa